Some resiliency shows itself like a moment of inspiration, an instinctive response to a difficulty; even if the situation strikes unexpectedly, we have the wherewithal to respond effectively. A friend hurts our feelings and instead of shrugging off the comment, we address the issue immediately and advocate for ourselves. Or a bill is overdue and money is tight, so we call the service provider and set up a payment plan. But such swift actions do not characterize the whole of our resiliency.

Many of the greatest difficulties in life require that we cultivate resiliency over the long term. We may encounter a life predicament to struggle with for months or years, during which time it appears that we lack resiliency. We endure the burden to the best of our ability. Perhaps we learn to struggle less and allow ourselves to be carried along by circumstances that we cannot control as we discover opportunities where action is warranted.

Given the long-term perspective, we discover our resiliency through its evolution–impairment, succumbing, languishing, stasis, thriving. What seems like lack of resiliency in any given moment is just one moment in a dynamic and fluid experience. Therefore, keep a wide-angle lens on the situation and a microscopic lens on the immediate calls for action.

Discerning when, where, and how to take action are building blocks of resiliency. And discernment, at best, implies clarity. We find clarity along the way as we examine our motives and our means for coping optimally. If you have problems with clarity and discernment regarding difficulties in life, I can help. Contact Vanessa Landau, Resiliency Trainer, for Co-Creative Transformation (Resiliency Coaching) and I will guide you along the way.

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